The 2013 Reel Deal Movie Awards

If there is one complaint that people could have against the Oscars, besides the fact that Oscar voters rarely pick the right film and are easily seduced by pretty campaigns, is that there awards just aren’t specific enough.

Boom! Problem fixed.

Here are some new categories I thought up to give some movies, directors, and actors who might not have gotten their moment in the sun otherwise. 

Some of these awards are compliments, some are not, and some will probably make no sense at all. But then again, anything makes more sense than “Shakespeare in Love” beating “Saving Private Ryan” for Best Picture.

Read the list below:

Most Underrated: The Heat

Most Overrated: Pacific Rim

Most Surprisingly Good: Iron Man 3

Indie Filmmaking Done Right: Frances Ha

Indie Filmmaking Done Wrong: The Way Way Back, Touchy Feely

Most Annoying New Indie Trope: Board game brings out tension between family members (The Way Way Back, The Kings of Summer)

Best Paul Rudd with a Mustache: Prince Avalanche

Best Directorial Debut: Jordan Vogt-Roberts (The Kings of Summer)

Guilty Pleasure I Didn’t Feel Guilty for Enjoying: Evil Dead

Most Misguided Allegory: Elysium

Best Use of Tom Cruise Yelling on a Football Field: Oblivion

I Don’t Get Your Accent: Jodie Foster (Elysium)

Best Franchise Installment: Catching Fire

Worst Franchise Installment: The Desolation of Smaug

Blandest Franchise Installment: Star Trek Into Darkness

Could Have Used a Colon in the Title: Star Trek Into Darkness

Movie I Haven’t Seen But Know Everything About Second Hand: Man of Steel

Best Animal Humor: Inside Llewyn Davis

Funniest Use of Drugs: The Wolf of Wall Street

Best Twist: Side Effects

Best Scorsese Movie Not Directed by Scorsese: American Hustle

Best Movie I Saw in Theaters in 2013 that Didn’t Come out in 2013: Life of Pi

Best Use of Coach Taylor Not Playing Coach Taylor: The Spectacular Now

Best Movie of the Year that was Actually a TV Show: Breaking Bad