Settle down, nerds! While you were still digesting your Thanksgiving meals, the first teaser for Star Wars: The Force Awakens was released in theaters and internets across the nation.
Now, I write this from the perspective of somebody who likes and appreciates Star Wars a lot, but is not a die hard fan. And let me tell you, it is a hard world to be somebody who likes, but doesn’t love, Star Wars. Most people consider Star Wars to be foremost in their cinema education. For me, franchises like Indiana Jones, James Bond, and Toy Story always impacted me more. But this is not my moment in the sun: this day is for you. I just join actively discrediting myself.
In Theory is a feature in which I make up theoretical projects and try to develop them.
Yesterday came with news that is either great or terrible, depending on who you are: Sofia Coppola will direct a live action version of The Little Mermaid.
At this point, the gritty reboots that Hollywood has been putting out in this post-Dark Knight era are starting to wear thin. Just because characters are moody, that does not mean a film is good. We are all looking at you, Snow White and the Huntsman.
The news that Sofia Coppola is at the helm is good news, given that she actually cares about important things like writing and directing. This will be a big test for her, as it will be her first major blockbuster effort as a director. I am hoping that Ariel will be played by Scarlett Johansson. Meanwhile, Eric will be played by an equally talented actor who will whisper something in her ear at the end. The fact that we can’t hear it is the point. So stop trying to figure it out, Internet!
Anyway, this all made me wonder what other directors would do if they were given a classic Disney property, a lot of money, and the maximum amount of creative freedom allowed by Mickey Mouse.
This week, I put myself in the shoes of an executive who can’t afford to screw another project up. Here is my list of hypothetical animated Disney reboots, and the directors who would bring them to life: