Monthly Archives: November 2014

New Star Wars Teaser: Because I Really Want You To Click This Link

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Settle down, nerds! While you were still digesting your Thanksgiving meals, the first teaser for Star Wars: The Force Awakens was released in theaters and internets across the nation.

Now, I write this from the perspective of somebody who likes and appreciates Star Wars a lot, but is not a die hard fan. And let me tell you, it is a hard world to be somebody who likes, but doesn’t love, Star Wars. Most people consider Star Wars to be foremost in their cinema education. For me, franchises like Indiana JonesJames Bond, and Toy Story always impacted me more. But this is not my moment in the sun: this day is for you. I just join actively discrediting myself.

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Movie Review: The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 1

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Mine’s bigger. Image via Mockingjay.net

As I settled into my seat for a late Sunday afternoon showing of Mockingjay Part 1, I looked at the crowd seated around me and realized how much power this franchise really has.

Young Adult is typically associated with “screeching sixteen-year-old girls.” That is essentially what the Fault In Our Stars screening I went to looked like. Instead the Mockingjay audience was mix of screaming sixteen-year-old girls, fathers bonding with their sons, couples on dates, and chatty older ladies. So, it is possible to make a blockbuster without pandering to the lowest common denominator.

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Celebrity Role Models to Look Up to Now That We Don’t Have Bill Cosby

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WE BOW DOWN TO YOU NOW. Image via Hitfix

As Rob Reiner says in The Wolf of Wall Street (nobody else in the history of humanity has said this): the chickens have finally come to roost, as a secret hidden in plain sight finally poked its ugly head out in full force.

Earlier this week, more women came out to say that they were raped by Bill Cosby. As a result of the mounting allegations, Netflix delayed the release of Cosby’s upcoming comedy special. and NBC completely dropped a planned Cosby sitcom.

In a very short amount of time, Cosby has gone from America’s TV dad, to something of a monster. To say his image is damaged beyond repair might be an understatement. Now, I see Cosby less as an inspiration and more like a condescending, power hungry butt wipe. It is a sad truth that public figures who seem outwardly kind can host a dark side. Right now, we are witnessing a real life version of Gone Girl unfold.

It is important to remember that celebrities are always putting on some sort of an act, both on and off camera. It’s just something they have to do. But don’t worry, we can still trust our idols. Since we don’t have Cosby anymore, here is a list of some other celebrities that are still good role models.

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The Reel Deal Podcast

Friendly Robots, The Comeback, Rosewater

In this episode of the podcast, I explore Hollywood’s new love of artificial intelligence. Plus, what The Comeback tells us about the year 2005, and what Rosewater tells us about the state of political satire.

Reviewing Rex Reed’s Reviews: The Grand Budapest Hotel

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Pictured: Rex Reed’s headshot. Image via New York Times

Against all odds, Rex Reed has had a long, fabled career as the film critic at the New York Observer. During his tenure, Reed used his review of Oldboy to insult the entire nation of South Korea, and then used multiple reviews to make fun of Melissa McCarthy’s weight. A lot of film critics can barely get by. Reed lives in The Dakota. I hope he gets haunted by the ghost of Rosemary’s baby on a regular basis.

The only possible reason he still gets work is because controversy gets clicks. You should check out one of his reviews sometime. Actually, don’t do that. Instead, I will read one of his reviews, so you don’t have to, and break it down. I will now be the first person to review Rex Reed’s reviews. Please, help me turn this into a living. I want to earn enough money so I can buy Rex Reed’s place in The Dakota.

For the second installment of this series, let’s talk about how Rex Reed talks about The Grand Budapest Hotel:

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Why It’s So Hard To Forgive Bill Cosby

Couldn’t have said it better myself, Bill. Image via Washington Times

So here we are again: it turns out that another much loved celebrity is actually a huge jerk.

This time, it’s America’s sweetheart Bill Cosby. The case against Cosby is equal parts strange and sickening. Once the most beloved sitcom dad on television, Cosby’s reputation has recently taken a hit as several rape allegations have been fired against him. The strange part is that these allegations have been public for almost thirty years, yet I didn’t find out about it until recently. Somehow, he found a really good publicist who managed to sweep all this dirt under the rug. Apparently, they didn’t do a thorough enough job cleaning.

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Movie Review: Rosewater

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The camcorder is mightier than the pen which is mightier than the sword. Image via Deadline

WARNING: This review contains spoilers for real life. Do not read this review if you are an idiot.

Hold the phone, are you telling me that they let a comedian direct a serious movie? What’s next? Dogs wearing suits to work? Civil debate between Democrats and Republicans? We can only hope.

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Movie Review: Interstellar

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“Hey, this isn’t where I parked my car!” Image via Hollywood Reporter

This review MIGHT contain some spoilers. I am not sure. I am very careful when it comes to revealing plot details in a film and I do my best to only reveal details that will create a better understanding of the film without ruining the possible intrigue of it. However, the rules of spoilers are a bit different when it comes to Nolan. So…POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT. Proceed if you’re not gonna be a jerk about it.

There are a lot of different sci-fi movies out there, but in truth, there are only two: those that want to be Star Wars, and those that want to be 2001: A Space Odyssey. Interstellar falls into the latter category. 2001 is probably the hardest to emulate, given that it starts with a bunch of dudes in ape suits playing with a skeleton and ends with a star baby floating in the sky. If anybody could at least come close to attempting this task, then it’s got to be Christopher Nolan. Or at least, that’s what you would think.

Unfortunately, Interstellar is a little bit like I thought it might be: a parody of a Nolan film more than a Nolan masterpiece because it has everything you would expect one of his films would have. Layers! Abandonment issues! Michael Caine! Husbands who won’t take off their wedding rings even though their wives are dead!

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Movie Review: Wish I Was Here

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Can you spot all the quirky things about this photo? Image via Hollywood Reporter

Zach Braff has only directed two films in the past ten years, yet he has somehow managed to piss everybody off. Maybe it’s time he gets out of Hollywood for a bit. Maybe he’s getting too much sun, and it’s time to go back and smell the fresh Turnpike air in New Jersey.

Braff’s latest film, Wish I Was Here, plays like a training montage of indie cliches. It’s like they just wanted to point their camera at a bunch of objects for 106 minutes and yell, “look how quirky this is! Do you feel the quirks yet? Do you?!” I could make a list of every little cliche, but that could fill up an entire review.

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Reviewing Rex Reed’s Reviews: Gone Girl

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Pictured: Rex Reed’s headshot. Image via New York Times

Against all odds, Rex Reed has had a long, fabled career as the film critic at the New York Observer. During his tenure, Reed used his review of Oldboy to insult the entire nation of South Korea, and then used multiple reviews to make fun of Melissa McCarthy’s weight. A lot of film critics can barely get by. Reed lives in The Dakota. I hope he gets haunted by the ghost of Rosemary’s baby on a regular basis.

The only possible reason he still gets work is because controversy gets clicks. You should check out one of his reviews sometime. Actually, don’t do that. Instead, I will read one of his reviews, so you don’t have to, and break it down. I will now be the first person to review Rex Reed’s reviews. Please, help me turn this into a living. I want to earn enough money so I can buy Rex Reed’s place in The Dakota.

For the second installment of this series, let’s talk about how Rex Reed talks about Gone Girl:

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